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By the Pond
17 Oct

Church, Faith, Election 2016, and Me

sidonamarie Blog 0 0
http://pcmonline.org/pcm-choir/

http://pcmonline.org/pcm-choir/

 

 

 

 

 

 

I am going to restate my words from the end of my last blog:

The feelings I have here I have had from a very young age. They have only grown in their depth of understanding even through the trauma expressed through my poetry. I would describe myself more as spiritual with faith in a higher power that holds us all in His heart as his children.

I no longer promote any specific religion. My faith has been “set free” is best I can describe it at this time. I saw the choir pictured above on Oct. 6, 2016. The children and adults expressed a simple, clear, and sincere faith. They judged no one. They condemned no one. They simply spoke of their experiences and sang with full hearts faith. I have not felt that for a long time.

This choir expressed Christian faith. However, for me in that moment, feeling those good and open hearts, understood that people like these are everywhere no matter the race or religion. There are good people who do not believe in any religion. This understanding was nothing new for me. My mind always know this, but my heart felt it again. You cannot find this on the TV or at a movie. You can only fine it in the course of your day watching for the good things – or, dare I say, making the good yourself.

Something comes to mind that happened a couple weeks ago. At the store the lines were long. The cashier (young) was having an issue with every order. I try to be patient in lines and with cashiers. I have the attitude I am being held up for a reason. There was a lady a little older than me behind me and a man about age after her. I wanted cat food that was on sale but they were out. I needed a rain check. So, the cashier rings up my whole order first. I pay. Now the rain check. The older man assumes I am upset over the price of something and want a refund. He says, “Oh common – I’ll pay you the difference.”  The cashier gets a stressed look. She’s been having a hard day. I turn, using my most pleasant voice, and say to him, “I don’t think you can. It’s a rain check.” He looks down and away. The cashier smiles.

Another thing occurred at the pie pantry where I work part-time seasonally just yesterday. I work a mixture of whites and Hispanics. One of my white counterparts is a avid Trump supporter (she is not alone there). I try not to get pulled in. People around there know I support Hillary Clinton – that is enough. We have a lot of teens and young people in their twenties. Some will be voting for the first time.  Last night my counterpart went over the top with a young, white, first time voter because she supports Clinton. Her face got red, she raised her voice and said, “If she is elected I am buying a gun and burying it in my backyard to protect myself. She is going to open trade and open borders and let anybody in.” My friend was on the edge of hysterical because the young person did not agree or know what to do with her reaction. I turned and got out my teacher voice and said, “That’s enough. Stop it.” She did. She was embarrassed to. I hugged her (in her forties) later and said I was sorry but it was a bit over the top. She agreed and replied, ” Yes it was and we are better than that.” I replied, ” Yes we are.”

A home near mine has a Trump sign in the yard (many do in my area) but this one was vandalized. The sign was spray painted and turned upside down. In this country we are allowed to express what we believe without fear. It is not us against them. We just differ in opinion on how to fix things. I will accept Trump as president is he wins. Will I be happy – probably not. I do not like the things I hear on the news – promotion of violence, now of revolution. No matter who is elected there should be a peaceful transfer of power. We have a government of checks and balances.

These things may not seem connected to church and faith. They are to me. I may have personally rejected the Catholic Church but I have not my faith in God. I believe I emotionally walked way from the Catholic Church the first time in spring 1994. So, in 2015 it was a quick choice and without regret – yet a sense of loss. Change never easy. I do not preach for anyone to leave it (and will not), because after all I have experienced and seen, I do not know where their heads and hearts are at. It is my only choice and with it a freedom that for me is right and lightens my heart giving me reason to keep writing. You take your faith with you wherever you go. A small moment like those shared above (God not mentioned only expressed in action) might turn the day around for someone and make another one think before they speak next time.

 


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About the Author

Written by sidonamarie

My poetry has been my therapy over the years. In 1993, an unusual traumatic event occurred with me. Poetry over the years has been my sorting out process. I have always had a strong spiritual nature balanced by strong doubt. During period of tremendous confusion, my poetry (sometimes more like stories my son thinks) helped me remember who I am, how I feel, and what I think and always have from a child. The theme I hope comes through is that we should not have our heads too far into the clouds or too deeply into the dirt. Life lives as balance somewhere in the middle with little visits to both edges. All 56 years of my life I have lived in Michigan. I was born in Kalamazoo September 16, 1958. My parents separated when I was young do to my mother’s mental illness. Dad died in 1965 at 29 from a cerebral hemorrhage. I was 6 when he passed. Grandma Peggy (my dad’s mother) went to court 7 times in a year and a half to fight for my younger sister (Kim who was mentally impaired) and me, because my dad had asked her too. She won custody of us. So, I lived with her in Bangor, Michigan through high school and college. I didn’t begin to write poetry until I went to live with my aunt (my mother’s sister) in Wartervliet, Michigan while attending Lake Michigan College in Benton Harbor. My aunt lived near my mother and her mother (my Grandma Elsie). After 2 years there, I attended Western Michigan University in Kalamazoo. I graduated with a Bachelor of Arts major in English and minor in Elementary Education. Right out of college fall of 1984 I was hired at St. Mary’s in Paw Paw, Michigan as a kindergarten teacher. I taught kindergarten for 1 year half days and was moved into a full-time first grade position for three years. I met my husband Gary during that time. On October 17, 1987, we married and I moved to Fennville, Michigan where I still live. Gary and I have a son age 24 and a daughter age 19.


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